Too much cuteness!

Jenna,

Today at breakfast, you watched Spencer lick the last drops of syrup off his plate. He was VERY focused on this, and because the plates are see-through, you watched his tongue make funny wiggles across the surface. You giggled...and said ," mom, Spencer is just SO CUTE!"

I agreed.

And then you said, "I think we should get rid of him because there is just TOO MUCH CUTENESS IN THIS HOUSE!"

Oh that made me laugh REALLY hard. :)

There is a lot of cuteness in this house--you included little lady! And I love it!

Love mom

A long, long while

Dear kids,

As you can tell by the date, it's been a long, long while since I got on here and wrote to you.

Oh how this saddens me!

I wrote you each letters in my mind daily...as I was sweeping the floor, rushing about, taking care of things that needed done. And I hoped I would get them written down!

But time passed...all too quickly, I might add. And my memory is not what it used to be. :)

I can tell you we have had some good days...and we have had some not so good days...but each day there has been something I have found...something good...something wonderful. It's hard not to with kids like you.

But today, I had to put the dirty dishes down...leave the broom in the middle of the kitchen floor...let things just BE for right now...because I feel so very impressed to tell you how much I love you.

I need you to know that. I do.

I often find myself getting really irritated at the times that I become frustrated with you guys...I snap quicker than I want to...my tone of voice is not one that I feel would be pleasing to my Heavenly Father. I find myself just needing to let go...to remember that you are children...to not expect perfection on an adult level.

And that's how it was tonight.

I don't even remember what spurred it initially...probably nothing that actually had to do with any of you. But as things unfolded, I found that little by little I was getting angrier and angrier...and I was taking my frustrations out on you guys.

We read stories, read scriptures, and knelt down for family prayer. We have started saying something each night that we are thankful for, so that the person who says the family prayer can be sure to include those things, and hopefully help our family to be more grateful. You guys really love this...and I love hearing your answers.

So tonight, we went through each of you...and then I asked someone to say prayer.

Jenna, you stopped me and said, "mom...what are YOU thankful for?"

Oh how this broke my heart. I hadn't even thought of a single thing...I had been so frazzled with my frustrations from the evening that I didn't put myself in that moment with you.

I felt my heart softening...it was the very thing I needed to turn the night around.

And really, I couldn't pick just one thing. I was thankful to each of you...and FOR each of you...thankful that daddy is working so hard to get through school....thankful for a roof over our head and food to eat...thankful for family...and that we get to be together forever. And I was thankful for second chances...and third chances. Because I certainly need my fair share.

I love you all. I do, even if I don't get to write every single night, like I originally planned on doing. Know it's in my heart...my thoughts...and I am really trying to be better.

Love,

mom

Prayer

Dear Kaden,

Today was your first prayer in primary.

I got to stand next to you, and listen to your little voice copy what I said.

You had been SO nervous before....in fact, I wasn't sure you were actually going to follow through and do it at all! But you were such a champ.

You made me proud little man.

Love, mom

pizza parties

Dear kids,

One thing I love is making pizza as a family. It's pretty much a weekly thing at this point--and I just think it's one of my favorite traditions we have together.

It's the homemade dough that you each love to steal so you can make your own stuff...it's the sauce you love to dip your fingers in...it's the cheese you try to sneak by the handful, only to leave a trail of it as you run out of the room. It's the smell of baking red peppers and bacon and olives and sausage...and hearing you each say YUM over and over.

I love it. Each part. Each piece...

Love, mom

Diaper Races

Dear kids,

Every night, right before climbing in bed, daddy and I have a race getting the boys nighttime diapers on.

Jenna, you are the one who gets it all started with your GO.

I love being surrounded by the cheering, the laughing, and the happy voices.

I have to admit, that lately I am losing my touch. :) Daddy has won the past few times...

What makes me laugh, Kaden, is that every single time (even those times you don't win) you come up to me and laugh while saying, "IN YOUR FACE!!"

Oh how I love those giggly moments before bed...

Love, mom

So grown up.

Dear Spencer,

Today we went to visit Squires castle. While it isn't really a "castle" per se, it may as well be in your eyes. It's empty, and a place for you to run and play...to imagine...to climb and dream and imagine.

And today, you did all those things.

And today, I saw you in a completely different light. I had my camera, taking pictures, trying to capture each of you in your element. There was a moment I had to stop--to actually put my camera down and just stare at you. You were so grown up.


I have had these ah-ha moments before. That's nothing new. But this experience just seemed so different. It was as if I saw you as you are, and yet as you will become, all in one.


I am grateful for that experience...and grateful for YOU...

Love you,
mom

Spring break...part 1

Dear kids,

Today was the first day of spring break, without having daddy around.

We went shopping for shoes for Kaden, picked up some new coloring books and paints, and spent much of the day in the sprinklers and playing outside.

While there were parts of the day that were difficult, I just love much about having you all around.

You all play nicely a good portion of the time...and I love how you rally around each other.

You're just good kids...I hope you know that.

Love mom

Easter Sunday

Dear Jenna,

Today was Easter...and also conference weekend. This meant we stayed at home and listened to the speakers. You brought home a little coloring book from primary the week before, so you could color the people as they spoke.

I didn't get to sit with you the whole time, but I loved popping in and watching you coloring intently...and I loved you showing off your artwork.

You're just growing up...and you make me proud.

Love, mom

The sandbox

Dear kids,

A few months ago, our neighbor gave us a sand/water table. We finally got the chance to put it up today. I cannot tell you HOW EXCITED I was to do this, because I knew you would love it!

I was sooo right! You did. You all stayed out and played all afternoon...

You came in full of sand, and completely happy.

And I wouldn't have had it any other way.

Love you my little sand-diggers. :)

mom

Eggshelland adventures

Dear Spencer,

Today we went to a place called Eggshelland--a house with all sorts of amazing displays, all put together by handpainted eggs.

It was a beautiful day. And daddy happened to have the day off school and such, so we all got to go together.

You ran around the driveway, yelling out in the best words you could, things like "EGGS, EGGS" and "DUCK, BIRD, BUNNY". Oh you were sooo excited.

It made my heart super duper happy...

Love mom

April Fools...

Dear kids,

Today was April Fool's day. And boy did we have FUN!

I worked all morning getting stuff ready. For lunch, we started with cupcakes. You guys were THRILLED! Cupcakes? For lunch?! You had no idea that it really was a meatball in a mini cupcake wrapper, topped with piped mashed potatos and a grape tomato on top...

Spencer, do you see your face?? You were less than thrilled that I pulled a fast one on your beloved "cherry". :)

While you were eating (and moaning about) your cupcakes, Kaden asked for a drink. I pulled out some "juice" (which was really jello I had made earlier in the day and put in the fridge with a straw).) Your faces were SO funny! You were shocked that you could sip NOTHING from your cups! I then told you that you were good sports, and since you had played along with my pranks, we would have pizza......a large pita topped with strawberry puree, grated white chocolate, gummy worms in red and green (for the bell peppers), black licorice for olives, and fruit rollup pepperoni.

IT WAS HILARIOUS! :)

I loved tricking you--and being the prankster. Though I am sure you will pay me back many more times in the years to come.

I love you all--and that's no joke! :)

Love, mom